Further unbloggable conversations have lead me to feel..
1. Grateful for the kind of person my husband is--open-minded and flexible in his thinking;
2. Grateful for the good relationship I had with my mother, which I see is really very precious and which has given me the ability to maintain a good relationship with my own daughter;
3. That not being overly possessive of one's children helps a great deal in having workable relationships with one's children-in-law (is that so dear DIL?);
4.That I am much more deeply feminist than I probably appear to be--I truly do believe in the equality of male and female--one maybe from Mars and the other from Venus, but they are still equal!!
5. That as I have grown older, things that earlier made me upset/depressed no longer bother me that much. I am also grateful for the kind of lifestyle and for having learnt when to let go and what to let go off, which has helped me reach a kind of serenity, not-withstanding the occasional bouts of depression arising from self-criticism. Of course I am basically a 'live and let-live' kind of personality, which probably makes it easier for me.
I am also grateful that I got this opportunity to appreciate my husband and my relationship with my mother--both of which (yes *sigh*)I had largely taken for granted.
Of course dear MIL. Who are you having these intense conversations with?
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteI had an incredible relationship with my mother as well. It makes such a difference, I think, though it may be why I still feel the loss of her so keenly.
having an incredible relationship with your mother is a wonderful gift. the other day my sister and i were talking about our mom. i started crying because i was at war with my mom till the day she died; i never gave myself the opportunity to get to know her as a human being, what kind of a person she was. i only knew her from what conflict she would cause me when i saw her next. because we were at war with each other, i feel the loss of her so keenly . . . imagine not being able to say i love you mom while she was alive and being a person your own mother was afraid of. now, with my 23 year old daughter, if there is any conflict, i withdraw what i'm doing and only allow myself to love her unconditionally and keep my mouth shut if i feel tempted to say something that would raise her shackles. loving my daughter unconditionally, i feel, has been a primary responsibility in my life.
ReplyDeletewhat hill do you live on, by the way?
ReplyDeleteNora, I live on a hill way down in South India.
ReplyDeleteI think having a good relationship with ones mother is so important because it lays the foundation for other relationships to come.
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