February is not too great a month for me, except that it's short!

Both my son and my mother passed away in February.  It is 19 years since my mother passed away and 13 years since my son passed on.  

I was there at both their bedsides when they passed and the memories of that are still very fresh.  

My mother's was totally sudden.  I had visited her at around 1 in the afternoon and she told me she had a back pain and to get her some medicines.  I got her the medicines, meaning to give them to her at 6 pm as I always visited then.  But I got called there at 4 and she just passed away in 15 mins.  It was such a shock.  

I was still teaching at that time.  I had planned to take her to Bangalore to visit her brother, as soon as school closed for summer vacation, which was usually towards the middle of March., and she had agreed to come.  Just two weeks before she passed, I had taken her to Cochin, whch is around 75 km from where we live, for her to do some shopping and she enjoyed it.  She was mostly on a wheelchair by then as her thigh bone had broken and though reset, caused her pain.  Even so, we had a good time.  I am glad we got to do that trip together.

She passed away around 3 months before she turned 90.  But she used to use the computer and would video call her sons in the US.  She had a chess game on her PC and she loved playing chess.  She had a blog, for which she would write out a post in a notebook, and I would type it up.  She was always interested in the world around her.  But I knew she was waiting to go.  She had talked to me about death and what it means to an individual at different points of time.  

I miss her especially when I hear the music which she love.